heaven-sent treat!

for now i really gotta believe the senseless statement i always make to people. well, it's somehow ridiculous in some ways if you don't see it my way - urgh, i lost my bloody new Dopod smartphone which i bought few days back. to be precise, it was only mine for 2 bloody damned days. i was moody at first, but later on, i turned out to be rather fine. it was sorta peculiar though. well, let's just say all thanks to the hot chocolate. *indulgence*

owh about the statement, what about this, well, the main reason God gives us the opportunity to earn some moolahz is because He wants us to be treated in a better condition, with THE money. i guess its provenly true now; no matter how i sillily i tried to escape from fishing out my ka-chings, i'd still have to spend on my SECOND MOBILE (what the heck) !!! agree on that? therefore, i got myself a new pair or Nike yesterday. =p and a NOSEY heels, lol.

gribberish!

all right, im currently working at the Shangri-la Hotel in KL the experience is awesome, you know, get to meet tonnes of new people, and to work with them! guess i do not have to mention the names here for myself as a mark for future reference cuz i'd remember im certain, and you to know them? it's not of importance, hehe dont get misunderstood, just that you wouldn't know them right, even if i DO list em names down, ah.. im outta mind. apologies!

geez, the touch of swaying things out together in a bond is way too brilliant an idea, grateful i am! well, just so coincidently i met 2 of my primary mates there at the banquet, i was shocked in astonishment, cuz one of them is kinda.. well, our parents know each other really well. we didnt have much time to chat the other day cuz she was in a rush, what pity! anyway, i felt a lil somethin' sooner then, spooky lil boogie.. *hehe*

ugh, you wonder how i lost my phone? well, i left it at Shang's ladies, got that? there's a price to pay for E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G !!! dammnit!


***

some days i just dislike myself. i am not firm. i am not generous. i am afraid. i am selfish. i am clumsy. i am all that you think i negatively am. i am indecisive. i am..

worth savin me..

plenty of photo frames abandoned. well, not exactly, there're just right there, in front of my macabre outlined eyes, with the carved-out decoration, like, a gal strutting her assets, the heaven sent innocent gal tryin to do some farming or even the simplest macked out woody ones..what a thing to say, they are just deserted as though they're meant to be. the existence is there but how well can a man misuse it and just shrug it off. just like a peanut. it is absurd.

nothing will be the same ever again, no matter how hard i try, gone are the days with honeyed memories, left are the fake hypocritical faces trying to be the same candy. or is it a rivalry, to be frank? i feel like chucking the faces into the nearest garbage around where noone else could catch me littering it. lol.

as days go by, even the most sophisticated philistines would be on tenterhooks. the practice gives us a moral value to be absorbed; never dwell too much of passion into some things. i know it will hurt really bad before it gets better. i am fooled. at this moment now, anyone'd like to punk me? please do.

no matter how hard i try, i can't love you anymore.

Dilemma

its freaking hard to do this, knowing its not right to drag but still, i have to. i gotta work out a good way to face this lil bug, pleaz, leave me alone. i have thought of ways to make it easy for everyone, generally, but people tend not to appreciate that. say what, Karma, im afraid of that truly. right, i hope i'd feel less remorse of a kind when i do step out wrongly in any ways. well, no regrets in life, remember it always carm!!

or rather, i should throw myself in the crowd, see if there are people who'd have their hands up to keep me in the air, that'd be way cool, like how Brendon Urie'd most probably do when he gets too lethargic of the camisado-hitz and thought of having everyone screaming at him, keeping him soaring high instead and getting carried away with him could jab a fascinating touch to that performance, ouchh!!! i wouldnt have a slight chance to! neither will i jump off frm the stage. lol.

im getting a lil' demented at the very moment, if you'd excuse me!

not forgettin' GN'R

they will never be forgotten. after all the drudgery that they have been through, they certainly deserve such grand tribute, from the deepest core of the heart. Welcome back! this time around, with Chinese Democracy. well, it's been a long time since they have released an album of new material (a profound intrusion having Slash gone!! sigh!). yes, im talking about Guns N Roses! nonetheless, Use Your Illusion I will still be the best album of theirs, i reckon. hehe cuz it simply has my favourite songs in it. *chuckles*

***

November Rain
performed by GnR

When I look into your eyes
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same

nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain

We've been through this such a long long time
Just tryin' to kill the pain
But lovers always come and lovers always go
An no one's really sure who's lettin' go today
Walking away

If we could take the time to lay it on the line
I could rest my head just knowin' that you were mine, all mine

So if you want to love me
then darlin' don't refrain
Or I'll just end up walkin'
In the cold November rain

Do you need some time on your own
Do you need some time all alone
Everybody needs some time on their own
Don't you know you need some time all alone

I know it's hard to keep an open heart
When even friends seem out to harm you
But if you could heal a broken heart
Wouldn't time be out to charm you?

Sometimes I need some time on my own
Sometimes I need some time all alone
Everybody needs some time on their own
Don't you know you need some time all alone

And when your fears subside
And shadows still remain
I know that you can love me
When there's no one left to blame
So never mind the darkness
We still can find a way

'Cause nothin' lasts forever
Even cold November rain
Don't ya think that you need somebody
Don't ya think that you need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one