i have no idea why im being treated in such an unjust situation and what have i done wrong? why do they have to do these things to me? am i not strong enough that you gotta cast a spell on me, that im blinded by the randomness, that i have to go through all of these and realise something else on earth? if yes, please do, im ready and i wont let you down.
and right there, as i read again of what i've just written, i feel so immature. you can call me childish. we have first world countries, third world industrial countries as well as developing countries. i think, i might as well be labelled as one developing human. a human being that needs decades just to prove to herself that she's capable. or perhaps not. she knows well that it all lies in the hands of god, the future. who can predict the future? nobody does.
i dont even have time to procrastinate. always in the midst of searching for excuses, making attempts to run away from reality. im such a big fat coward. the fat one. that the ass is unadjustable - that cannot be moved - the ass which cant me moved.