Offline

i've been ill for days. i guess it's recovering. one thing i dont understand, this year seems to be a real hard year for me. i have so much to worry and things are bothering me. actually i think i'm sort of a weakling this year although it doesnt sound right to be voicing out from my mouth but the fact, it is. it's quite ridiculous, you might say it. i dont care, so long as i feel that it's what i am going through. i am strong, it's from a friend of mine. i will remember it. *winkz*

somehow examinations are just around the smelly corner. i could already smell it. the smell is not nice guyz. i kinda already feeel the tension. i guess i wont be onlined for these few days... or weeks? lolz, it's quite impossible for a person like me. i mean for days, perhaps i could. weeks? well, let's wait and see. see if everything goes right and i do Not have to post anything here. or to get things right, something BiG happened to me. i think i would be on then. see yaz!

cheers everyone. and peace out. take care while i'm away.

Learn it

so i might sometimes offend others but that is never truthful, i just want to be heard. have i gone wrong? no matter what i say, it seems wrong to others, all right put it this way, most of the time and i'm here to tell that i hate it. pretty much. i know it's not right to be always exposing the truths, as for your information, we ought to conceal slightly a little from others as to keep them company. we never say things to hurt others because it aint gonn' bring out the beautiful scenario.

all we gotta do is just be patient. ya know, patience! man, it's tough. well, have we had any learning-to-breathe lesson? i guess not. what about patience? i wonder...

Lost vs Omen

i just dont understand why people do things without a particular reason. i guess i am too. that's crazy isnt it? it's common i have no idea what others want but it's darn peculiar that i dont know what i want. please show me the omen... i'm lost inside. and i sort of think that life is totally unfair. i always do not get what i want, instead, i have what i dislike or refuse to have. so life's unpredictable huh?

i guess i need some time all alone. frankly speaking though, it doesnt help much and perhaps doesnt at all heal. i'm only waiting for miracle to happen although i always encourage others to create it but to cross hands waiting... somehow it's easier to be said than done guyz and you know that! argh, i am so dumb and bothered.

Unique

today is thursday. i am quite fascinated because today is a holiday. when i want to get myself to actually feel it, i think of my tasks. to be frank, today is just special. i do not know why because it's so special that i dont have this kind of feeling even during weekends. this is weird. this feeling is impermanent though. i still have my tasks to be completed but i dont feel like doing. my sloth is performing again. gawd please help me.

why do i not know what i should know? i just hope my dreams would not be shattered.

Oh Boy, My Personality?

Your Personality Type
You are an optimist who is often more focused on the past and the future than the present moment. You have an active imagination. You have good hunches and intuitions and people notice that.

Your Motto
"I want to discover the truth in life."

How You Work best
You work best in cooperative, harmonious environments. Competition, a rushed pace, and a strict format for communication don't work well for you. Your strength is your open-mindedness. Your Achilles heel is that you are sometimes too hard on yourself.

Your Life Situation
You are not fully satisfied with your current life situation. It is in your own hands though to change this. Every day you have the opportunity to improve your life situation by making decisions that suit your personality best. Making decisions that suit your personality best benefits all areas of your life: your relationships, your career, your love life, your goals, your family life, and your health. In order to make the decisions that suit YOU best, you need to know your personality well.Learn more about your unique needs and how to shape the environment that suits you best and start making the right decisions today.

Reason Why

why am i sooo lethargicly sluggish??!! haha an easy word, lazy, means it all. we do not even have to think twice.

i am so dumb. well, both are not related i know but someone who's always escaping from the reality and not wanting to complete his/her tasks is me. someone who cant resist the temptation of the damn MSN Messenger, is me. someone who can be sleeping for hours during saturdays and wasted the most apposite day to complete tasks is also the girl who'd rather be blogging than to be doing her add maths tasks! why me??!!

the mid term examination is awaiting just around may. i cannot imagine how the result will turn out to be. hopefully it's what she wants. this girl just took a long hours of nap, long enough to match the hours that she spends on sleeping for her nights. i do not know how she could do well in the upcoming examination unless she decides to change her attitude. now changing attitude is another problem for her too. she has just too many things to handle.

procrastinate is always the best thing she does. no one does better than her. i do not understand the reason why, even until now. phew.

Statue

no one could ever know how i truly feel inside. i have something i've always wanted to tell anyone about anything, but i am not given the opportunity to do so. i have to cross my hands and wait, and wait and still waiting... mind you, it's never my intention to not telling.

apparently i'm missing someone. i wonder that person actually knows if i'm missing him/her. i feel that i'm such a chicken all of a sudden. i dont dare voice out what i want. i think it's most probably influencing myself. others tend to think i dont want to make my own decisions. you've gotta know, i've tried so hard to make but finally i have the answer. wait a minute, i'm hesitating if i should disclose. you guys are probably having a thought in mind that this is actually about courtships or something but think about it thoroughly, could it be? no one ever knows because for your information, i do not always tell my problems to anyone. it could be my bovine stupidity of being such a timid person!! man, i dont even dare face my own life.

my raspy voice is telling me to do what i should but on the other hand, it's still depending on this miss, whether she wanna move forward. no regrets? i dont think so. i was afraid to even call my great grandma when she was struggling to live at the hospital years back. it still lingers in my memory...

should i just do what i wanna do and forget about others just because i'm living my own life? i do not know. and it's never known.

are you who you wanna be?

In the Mood

i am so dangling in the air!! i feel so great right now. you know, with all these changes. i've changed my blogskin to this current inspiring one other than the previous one which someone called it as plain and mundane. forget about it, if you know who i'm talking about. hey, that opinion was actually quite motivating once you've seen this page, i mean you've gotta be an all-time reader of mine to get to know this. all right, enough of that. in fact, i changed because i feel that it's time for a change. you know, from ignorance to wisdom!

cool stuff, i've changed soo darn lots of things in just merely a day. i enjoyed the process of it, really. well..

shrug off your shoulder and forget about yesterday, tomorrow is yet to come!! we spread out our hands to welcome it, and that's happy! i am so in awe without a particular reason. aint it funny? especially imagine this, i'm typing in front of this monitor. hehhe.. i'm going insane.

somehow this feeling is impermanent. indeed, nothing is. we should just remain the incredible power of being appreciative. i do not know what will exactly happen or i mean not even a slight hint of the yet-to-comes so i reckon we should just anticipate. com'on, that's unpredictable isnt it? all right, i was being lectured by somebody else, someone who's worth all my eardrum juices and my time. thanks for right believing all this while.

Brand New

i just wanna post something here coz i feel that i want to do so. i have so much work to be completed yet i'm still here blogging. all right, be it i just wanna runaway from the reality for at least few minutes. i need to breathe. i wanna change; to a new leaf? i guess it's not approriate to use in this situation on account of the fact that i wasnt a defiantly rebellious kid who wanted a new environment. i just wanna change.

i've put aside my homework to be blogging this out, is this a changing course? everybody faces problems but i dont see it. therefore, i take for granted. i think the problems that i'm having now is the toughest to go but in fact it might be yes, might be not. i'm just coming clean.

i'm sad for a moment.

you know, sometimes i feel that i can get along really well with people but too, occasionally i think that they do not really like me, in a sense that i'm being too well, indescribable. surprisingly, i get along really well and feel totally comfortable with people elder than me, they tell me their experiences. and those actually make me more mature. wait a minute, am i mature? my mind is too old for my age, sometimes. i could be naive though, as it's alwalys coming out from my friends' mouths which i do not really agree with but i am not against it too. my lovely buddies help me making decisions all the way; turn me to a more rational person. i wanna thank everyone who has helped me all along. i appreciate that.

i think i wasnt myself though i was. i want a vivid and clear observation of myself from others and myself, most importantly. i cant wait for a new day's arrival. wait for me, i'm coming!

Empty

i am so hungry right now. i havent gone downstairs to check out what i'll have for my breakfast hehe, so lazy to get down actually. i'll probably be getting down after this, else i'll be starved to? hehe.

life is a hassle. my time is all jam-packed. sigh. my homework is much enough to kill my time, i dont even have my own space, i mean to chill. please dont tell me by surfing the net is one of the chilling games. you know, last time when you get to online, it was like the sweetest thing. but that was last time! i dont wanna mention about it, about how time has changed. i'm all with my homework and stuffs. aiks, sort of getting idle right now. pheww.

whenever i blog, my emotion changes. and that's how i feel at the moment. i was so moderate, but now? sighh. that doesnt heal my empty stomach, or maybe i'm just too hungry to write any longer.

love me or i'll be gone, i'll be gone...