Never Know

never knew i would come this far.. so far that i'm away from my social circle, at least on the verge of it.. things just get outta hand... am really envious of those who have not any much bizarre to even have a thought about..while on the other hand they just bug me like...a swarm of bees perhaps? i've had enough man..i've been fooled..

and i hate making decision especially..you know, maybe you dont understand me..when it comes to making a choice among all, it's like the worst thing for me..i'm aware of this n that.. sometimes i even doubt if i'm too lazy...of not to even wanna blend my brain juice a lil' bit to fumble for balls that lead me to the bingos..

shit.

let the people say what they wanna say man.. it's not like i have to listen to them..i mean really, if they're so good at giving opinions or this and that then why are they still right here, struggling for the pot of gold? tell me?! don't make me laugh man.. go figure, if you follow what they say, they will not be responsible of the consequences after that and ahh.. Aftermath!

you're the only one to blame in everything you do.. and oh purr-leeez, do it your way..

i'm really trapped now this time. cant move forward. cant go backward. what am i supposed to do with all these...hah! perhaps i'm just somebody who's full of crap..i can blog anything but it's just that..sigh i cant do anything about it..

omens oh omens..show me the way there..


i need a miracle.

Those Days are Gone

i must have had alot of things swallowed before i started chewing.. it hurts now, cause i choked.. badly..

i never did appreciate the bad times i have had with anyone, i thought it should and ought to be forgotten..but now, i think it absolutely have to be kept as remembrance...once it's gone, there's no turning back.. even the bad days..

even if you're halfway in a conversation with someone u hate, trust me.. you'll miss it someday..at least u guys have had things to quarrel and fight over.. come to think of it, so wht's the purpose of keeping 2 good friends together if there's not much topics to linger on.. you see even the foes could have the chance to get in touch to themselves..

i missed those days..

which is much worse when it's someone you truly care about.. someone u used to chew gums for a few hours..and yet still having a conversation goin on..aint it miraculous? things will never be the same again when time comes because blatantly time can change someone else's life.. just everything... it just slips off your head without your knowledge.. here we are, sitting on the same table, having nothing much to gossip or so.. it's like a sword is right there in between the two of you, awaiting the conquerer to sweep off the dirt and bridge the gap behind the walls..

i could never relive those days..

i'm not the only one living this complicated and totally messed up place.. friends are everywhere.. but is wearing a mask to communicate with them necessary? unfortunately it does.. subsequently love is all around us.. so basically life is unpredictable.. perhaps saturated with hidden tricks of dark lies..

this is a lie..

darlin, tell me what's in the air right now? i have tried my best to help but despite my helpless stupidity, i turned the other way and messed up the Whole... (hint: inspired by John Steinback's The Pearl, a beautiful novel.)

thanks for the love that i have had and still owning it. i miss my late grandma now, suddenly. are you watching us from up above?



Love, i appreciate. Someone's watching over me, anytime and everywhere. Kisses from me. Lonely no more..

Yeah, ThanKs??!!

Shit happened.

i thought today would be the greatest joy i'd get, after all the time i've spent on being a nerd..and all..i could never expect shit like this to have happened on me.. you know what? i lost my purse!! now i desperately gravely need a job...sigh..how could this happen to me?? what have i done wrong??

how could You do this to me? it's as if i've not problems to handle..

well, think again..i guess it's because i havent been contributing any to society..so You made this happen..thank you very much..i will remember it! I'm sad but a part of me just whispers to me..i've just made a donation!! A big one.

its the last day of the examination. so what now, just wanna get a job.

Get a job!! no tears, darlin.