Doubt

11 dayz of strugglings ended the way it should be. im finally back to life again but on the other hand that was just the beginning of the very extreme i know. i feel like having a hard rock placed in my brain and yet it is so darn heavy. i wanna remove it but the truth is my energy forbids me to having it done and out. it's aching.

went out to release stress today but it seems that it was quite depressing in the end; having noticed that my purse was screaming for companions aka the money. i spent so much today on presents and of course for my own. fortunately my buddy spent more and that i could actually find a reason for myself not to be down. moreover, money is just money but happiness is everything and miraculous.

and sadness is? i dont dare mention anything about it. i think my heart wanna stop here.