wanna be happy

no matter what i've done, i reckon there's actually nothing much i can do now to make it all up. it's not like i've done anything wrong or what, but it might be wrong, under all circumstances i mean..one thing i know though is that we should never be regretful..everything that happens, happens for a reason.. and life goes on..

just had a conversation with vic. he made me realise how life should be and we must be tough to face it. and measure everything by ourselves, i was like, so true. we have to face it our own..because this is my life, i ought to live it the way i want it to, without regrets of course which figuratively means dealing with things in a rational way..

however i did catch a movie with may and jet yesterday..Walk The Line that is.. it is indeed a magnificent movie, unlike some would even call it an insipid one..haha..that movie really got me into it, those things that they were in, made me feel like it shouldn't be this and that..haha..got me heart beating over..somehow i went through a real tiredness after that movie, perhaps i paid a lil too much of concentration..haha and my eyes were hehe..sort of red! cool cool.. 2 grammys at least, good job! woohoo, somehow my movie awaiting list up next would be Casanova! haha..

i live my life. never care what other people say.. i just wanna be happy and i hope sincerely that you do too! peace out! =p

nothing else matters

just because you actually are standing next to the edge of the fire, this does not necessarily make you wrong. it's like whatever i do is wrong to you, you pick up on me this and that, if not everything. i am downright frustrated at times but all i can tell is that i do not have to make any so-called explanations as my words don't affect any other consequences no more. it's sad when someone has soon lost their prerogatives. somehow, i do not always think i'm right all of the time, like you presume foremostly. the urge of reasoning things to you, has soon faded away, as you would also try to think i'm actually making up bulldog stories. on the other hand, i'm also touched that there're actually people out there who have faith in me, all this while. you used to be one of them, so long as i'm aware of. i still bear with the silence that you give me and the coldness.. all the zits of emotions which i do not have to let myself suffer. but i did. and you never cared. what am i supposed to do? anytime from now, i just thought that everything we do, it's for someone else's sake, so there's no right or wrong. or perhaps it's right to be wrong at times, to gain your experiences and stuffs. thanks to God who gets me through all these. it aint over yet. it's growing older and older. i'm like.. suffocated. i wanna get back to school!!

nothing else matters. when you've already given your reasons for whatsoever that you've done, that's it. if that someone refuses to trust you, then just let it be. it's not like the whole world's gonna stop and stare at you if you never got the forgiveness or so, like that particular person doesn't believe you no more, what's the point of it?

i've always believed in you. why do you not?

No Bails!

went for a gathering two days ago. and a party.

doubted it, i never knew such a clash would happen. things didnt really get screwed up though.. thanks for everything. i was overwhelmed, the first thought was that i wouldn't be as much excited i'd get the other day..perhaps it was the spirit that got me through.. i was ecstatic!

here i am, once again, am doubtful. will we ever get together again for such a night? be it glamorous night or not, all of us had fun.. i could see it with bare eyes..think about the abstract question again, i whisper silently, hope.

another one thing crawls into my mind all of a sudden, outta that ray of light, so you think you're always right, as if none of us cares about you and, monitoring such a behaviour - ignorance, so you're surrounded by friends everywhere, what do ya think then? is that what you want? what do you want, actually? you're just asking too much from us man, i need a break down about it. so just, please tell me. i guess though, you'll never know about this and no one's gonna confront me about this, no matter how many hours later. this much i know. and this much is true.

i want you to confess. i need a confession from you. i really do.


family in crisis that only grows older...

everything's changing

as obvious as it is, everything is indeed changing, day by day..well uhm..as long as the time ticks its way out to nowhere, or perhaps somewhere that i have totally no idea about it..we're still making our lives here..

society is changing
man is changing
demand is changing

or have you changed, already? my dearest reader? you'd rather call it transformation, maybe? well, my love is never changed, i'm still the same old me..omitting the fact that i'm growing..as much as you do..i've made mistakes but i'm just a girl, what could ya possibly expect? even adults make mistakes..i dont know how i should hold my future..and partly, i know..just let it be right? i know what's in your mind, dude..it's not as if i can get a hand on it..

wake up, babe!

ah, i'm starting work tomorrow. wish me luck!