i can't believe im feeling better now. is it because i have mood swings or the world is round. somehow i feel kinda sleepy. though im actually texting someone on the phone. owh, on the screen. i just got to know this person, few days back i guess, oh well, yesterday. haha! surprisingly we have things in common. and i keep bullying this person.
it is fun.
then again...
not as fun. because im not talking to someone i want. because im not texting message with the one i love. because im not seeing someone i've missed. because i am sleepy but i dont feel like sleeping. because im feeling better but that doesn't mean im happy. because only someone can make me happy. because someone is not cracking me up with jokes. because everyone is busy. because no one cares.
im swept away by love.
counting the days | days will somehow come to an end | just wandering around for the unforeseen future
Friday, January 25, 2008
Thursday, January 24, 2008
ReiMei to Silk Road
im seriously going nuts. im going crazy. i dont know what i live for. in this life, i know i was loved by you, you, you, you, you and probably you too! i might have all the love in the world, but it all boils down to the same damned question.
what have i been doing all my life?
the chief point is this : why.
no one could ever give me the defined and definite answer. i guess this is just one of those days again. i know this isn't the first time i'm going through such situation, and i actually have intention to go somewhere alone, for instance, i would go shopping alone or to take public transport alone.. i kinda enjoy it sometimes, or perhaps most of the time if im not in a hurry. it's basically because i get to listen to my favourite music and the best thing in it is that i live in the world of my own. the music to my heart is the key to my serenity. one i define.
also.
when you have something, you don't appreciate them. by the time you lose it, you will eventually start thinking about it, or do ponder-s. this is very common, isn't it? it's the selfish part of oneself. or rather, i would say, we lack self-conscious. most of everytime, we are not aware of what we are doing. we just want something new. we want to fight the curiosity in us. ultimately. we try new stuff. in the long run, we give up.
hell. it sounds like a sick cycle.
there's no practical sense in that. i can't fight this feeling anymore.
i guess i will stop all of these mindful thoughts and take shower now.
what have i been doing all my life?
the chief point is this : why.
no one could ever give me the defined and definite answer. i guess this is just one of those days again. i know this isn't the first time i'm going through such situation, and i actually have intention to go somewhere alone, for instance, i would go shopping alone or to take public transport alone.. i kinda enjoy it sometimes, or perhaps most of the time if im not in a hurry. it's basically because i get to listen to my favourite music and the best thing in it is that i live in the world of my own. the music to my heart is the key to my serenity. one i define.
also.
when you have something, you don't appreciate them. by the time you lose it, you will eventually start thinking about it, or do ponder-s. this is very common, isn't it? it's the selfish part of oneself. or rather, i would say, we lack self-conscious. most of everytime, we are not aware of what we are doing. we just want something new. we want to fight the curiosity in us. ultimately. we try new stuff. in the long run, we give up.
hell. it sounds like a sick cycle.
there's no practical sense in that. i can't fight this feeling anymore.
i guess i will stop all of these mindful thoughts and take shower now.
shut up and go carmen.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Miss Independent
it's late.
im listening to alicia's tell you something (nana's reprise) uh..
she's got a gorgeous voice.
i guess im kinda stressed out currently. i dont wanna talk to anyone about my problem. though if you'd ask me, i might tell you. because normally i dont bring issues at work home. it is not my way of dealing things. therefore i choose to walk my way back home. i've done that not many times. in fear of strangers, or whatever. i miss my music. even if im listening right now. im also missing someone, even if you're here with me right now. always.
i can never get enough of music.
as to how i can never get enough of you.
im listening to alicia's tell you something (nana's reprise) uh..
i cant wait i wont wait i dont wanna wait...
she's got a gorgeous voice.
i guess im kinda stressed out currently. i dont wanna talk to anyone about my problem. though if you'd ask me, i might tell you. because normally i dont bring issues at work home. it is not my way of dealing things. therefore i choose to walk my way back home. i've done that not many times. in fear of strangers, or whatever. i miss my music. even if im listening right now. im also missing someone, even if you're here with me right now. always.
i can never get enough of music.
as to how i can never get enough of you.
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