breaking out!

dude.. im actually having my break time, it is fun while sneaking out at this time because it feels as if you're getting a little bit more than you're supposed to. reason being most of everyone here can not surf the net anytime they want. i can - because i didn't ask permission from anyone, and the person that's supposed to be in charge of me today, is right now having her own sweet time in the sweetness of noodles. well, i did too. not noodles though, i had sourish fish and yam-my-sth and chicken and bla bla.

well, i must say i have begun to develop a little bit of fanciness in singapore. i went to one of the shopping complex at dhoby ghaut yesterday and i bought 2 jeans, haha, mind you, they're cheap. like, really affordable.. it was fun going out with my soon-to-be roommate! guess what, i have found myself a new place to rot, well not exactly, but a better place to stay. its owned by 2 old folks, address them as uncle and auntie, typical chinese. having said that, we do know it always feels good to be home. till i speak again, im having my fingers crossed, toes as well, anticipating my new house!! hehe.

anyhow there isnt any big changes in the fares or expenses which im gonna have to fish out in the upcoming days, it is all the security and the feeling of not being ripped off by yet another conman that count. go figure. and yes, im not having a very good time staying at my current so-called master room. no doubt, though, it is indeed a strategic place to stay but too bad, i reckon it is just not for me. that is a private area and therefore hefty. i deserve a much better place, basket!

for you to be noted and myself to be gleeful, im not placed at the front desk today. instead of sitting there portraiting a very modelised civil person, im in the reservation room doing some 'important tasks' (read : supporting documents & et cetera) where i dont have to be extra careful toward the way i represent myself and of course, the lipstick doesnt have to be as red! cool stuff, wheee~~~ love me, miss you.

it's what i do.

im only free today, not totally. got an appointment with a tenant later so i'll just loiter around, see wht i can do. well, look, wht else can i do, other than shopping? hehe, since there's not much time left, despite my sloth for waking up late today. i guess i'll just come online, surf the internet? right after this, i will go somewhere. im not sure where to go though, will ask my friend later, hehe.

i got tipped!! 2 days back, and that kind of tip, so easy to obtain. i dont feel the challenge at all, will try harder next time. and what is more interesting, there's a guest who appointed me as one of the outstanding staffs there in the hotel. i should feel excited. but im not. i dont have the passion for anything today. i just wanna live or write or blog or sigh.

i just started my class on wednesday. the seniors said we're gonna have tough assignments ahead but i'll conquer 'em all, nothing comes easy, especially the beginning eh?

im bored today, its sucha mundane to carry on with this life; stuck. i gotta move out from the house. i will have more activities planned. till then, peace out! hehe.

i guess i have a positive mood today other than being just bored. bored is not negative. because... i have no idea! lol. hehe, britney's Circus is coming out soon, yay!!

ill

as i was waking up to the early morning at earthly hours, i found myself being late. and to make things worse, i fell ill - i have bad cough and flu. and i feel cold. that is very rare. so yea, im sick! im not proud to say that but i just feel so pathetic; away from home and you're sick. i so totally feel it now. the moment i was coming down from my bed, i had the feeble energy in me. still, i had to rush. no matter how long i wanted to sigh, how long i wanted to just stand there, being numb. time was moving and ticking so constantly. i had to dash.

things are still hot in the oven. i just got started. i cant complain.

perhaps i'll crap more tomorrow because my bladder is full now and the menstruation is hitting me. i feel terribly horrible. so uneasy. see u soon.

six days

i am truly lethargic. i have inadequate sleep these few days, as i come to think about it. the pathetic reason that leads to that is simply because the air-conditioner in the room is not cold enough, friends know me, and you knw me, i cant sleep if it's too hot. hell yeah, that's how you wake me up. and for the record, out of certain circumstances, my instinct got me to a drink last night. yeah, right after my shift.

my philipino friend, Jane called up to ask if we should go to the marriot hotel for a drink, hesitantly, i doubted for a while because i was thinkin if i should do laundry last night. my mouth murmured a yes when my heart said no. so there, i went! well, to be frank, i knew i was going but i just wanted to cling onto the phone for abit. i was telling myself, i should start having fun from here rather than keep thinkin back the memories that i had with a couple of friends and more importantly my family.

seriously, i didnt think i would have this feeling. this is, everything on my own. haha, alrighty, i wont go back to the ole negativity.

so there, i went. last night - the living room @marriot. we ordered baileys chocolate icecream shake, yeah tht was a mistake. lol. but i still love baileys. =) then we had cranberries and pizza. some guys just kept offering drinks. well, i drank a chardonnay/blanc. bumped into this englishman, he claimed that shanghai is the best city he's ever lived. well, what can i say, i havent been there, and for sure i will, someday. i know i will, too.

oh well, about the workplace, the hotel. the hotel royal. the one at the queen street. they thought i was from private school or something, go figure. and everyone thought i came from the philipines. wht ridiculous. lol. and about the presentation, i've gotta tie my hair up really neatly in a hairnet/tube. and there shouldnt be any strands of hair that is to be seeeen, wht the heck! ' i want you to look like the airstewardess' shit, in my heart i was saying, jetstar's cabin crew can have ponytails. ' and please take constant care about your face, not forgetting to apply lotion or moisturiser on every part of your body' sigh. i'll just spray my hair with the hairspray or apply gel till it becomes dry. ah, look at my dry skin! and whts more funny, 'never walk out without your pantyhose'! wtf. gaahh~~ thanks for her kind reminder.

homesick. so jet thinks its funny. im getting over it! give me some time, will ya? and my friends, i wonder where they have gone. people assume i'll just make new friends here and forget about evryone. dont you think its a little too redundant? how could someone forget good memories. anyone, tell me?

jane and i. with the drinks and the 2-slices-left cheese pizza.
geeeeeeeeeee~~

to be me

i think it is now proven true that people used to say how the singaporeans read in the MRTs, LRTs and even buses. i didnt really buy that but now as i've seen them with my naked eyes, i can now tell you that it really is, yeah still, is happening. everyone is so busy and hectic life they have here.

then again, as i compare it with malaysia, i kinda feel the serenity here. that, readers, is when i put it in a better expression. otherwise, go figure. the feeling is totally different.

argh, its time for me to go. be back soon.

life in singapore

this is gonna be a random post. just a slight stream of consiousness. so please, pardon my rambling and do miss me. because i do.

i thought i could handle everything on my own. i said to myself that i will try everything ahead, whichever that's gonna fall on me, anything, anyhow, on my own. im just wretched out. i have no other words to say.

perhaps i havent really tried adapting to the new environment, i will try to look at it the other way, the positive side. im pretty sure i can make it. i keep telling myself that life would be better, everything will be just fine once i have come to make new friends or join the new society.

can u imagine me, not goin online for even a day? frankly speaking, it is like hell to me. i was just lying on my bed, sad to say, tears caught my eyes, came streaming down my cheek.. i never intended that to have occured to me, i really didnt want to. i miss evrything. i miss my family and friends. as im writing this, tears are in my eyes. i cannot put it in words. i know im gonna have to be tough. i keep telling myself to face this on my own because i chose this path.

on top of that, i know i will enjoy my entire days here because i know what im doing right. i know its just the alter ego thats been stubborn. this wayward feeling that's kept within me.. believe me, i will let it go.

i will be fine. stay tuned for more of me.

better days

at times i do wonder why we struggle so much to obtain something, to search for something that is out of reach.. it is just so unfair, that we work so hard in order to prove that we can, at the very least, to ourselves. when you think everything is running smoothly, something backfires you. that is like the end of the day. life is just a cold rain. you're all alone. you have to deal things on your own, even when your friends offer you the hand.. the truth is, you're caught up.

imagine there was no tomorrow, imagine life without anyone.